Men need feminists to fix feminism first. Modern feminism is very broken, and we can’t fix it for you, because we’d be “mansplaining.” Start with these two things — fixing them will clear a lot of the deal up:

1. If Gender is a social construct, then there’s no more need for Title IX. Pick one, throw the other away.
2. Should a battered women’s shelter be required to accept biological males who identify as female, and have them bunking with the women in need of shelter? Pick yes or no, and stick to your answer.

There’s a bunch more, but those are two pretty obvious ones, and fixing those two will probably fix a lot of the others by association.

As someone who used to self identify as a feminist, I’m pulling for you. But inside your current framework, I’m not allowed to talk. It’s going to have to be people like you who step up to the plate to fix it.